Week 25: Personal Confessions - How to deal with Disappointment


Hi there! So after last week's post I got really good feedback and people have been asking me questions and one of them is "How do you deal with disappointment". If you read my post a couple weeks back about "the blogger behind the blog" you will remember that I mentioned I am a very emotional person because for me anything and everything goes straight to my heart and it hurts. I know most people have a filter so that things only reach and stay in their heads but for me my heart receives it before my brain does and it causes all sorts of issues for me BUT that is also my strength. I know you confused now because How can someone who gets hurt easily also have that as a strength?

Since I was a kid if anyone said or did anything to me I cried not necessary whaling but tears will follow. As I started to grow I used to try and blink the tears back so that I do not cry there and then but I don't know about you I love a good cry because then I get over it (disappointment or pain) quickly that way and it leaves my system faster than most people. So much that anytime I think of the hurt have experienced I don't get mad because I cried the MAD out of me, these days especially I just laugh then I look at the situation and best way to go about it. I also have another way of dealing with hurt and disappointment, I write things down. I will tell you a story of one of my first biggest disappointment in life.

I remember when I was 13 and started dating my FIRST crush, I thought @13 that he was THE ONE. I felt so much "love or lust" that I thought without him I would be lost bearing in mind I was way happy before he came along. Then one day the devil tested that supposed love I had for this boy, the crush asked me @13 him 18 to have sex with him. In today's talk that's rape pure and simple because apparently mental capacity of 13 year old is not high enough to understand full consequences of ones actions. Anyway, I was so hurt that he asked me that because my belief system told me NO SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE (back then). I told him NO and said (will never forget this) go find yourself a girl who wants to have sex with you because I ain't her. And by the grace of the heavens he did do just that, I found out about it obviously like a fool last. Because his sister and I were in same class and people were so interested in my relationship they all knew before me (high school for you). The girl he slept with was older than me and scared of me too, every time she saw me she used to leg it (funny that). So anyway, after the incident I decided that was it but before all could be concluded his friend who had a crush on me asked to see me I went innocently to talk to him. He made me laugh and smile which I hadn't done at that time for a while, whilst chatting my crush arrived and ignored the jesus outta me obviously I was hurt because he wronged me but because I had cried it out and wrote it all I didn't care that much. Later when I was leaving he had the audacity to accuse me of cheating and saying it was my fault for him sleeping with another girl "granted I told him to find someone else to sleep with" but not when we were dating. You should be happy to know my sweet 13 dumped his ass and found better frogs along the way, 4 years later the crush came back begging for my forgiveness. What the crush didn't know was the day I said goodbye to our relationship was the day I forgave him. I didn't have and still don't have time to hate people or not forgive them, I only have room for happiness and smiles all day long nothing else.

So this is how I deal with disappointments, I cry, I write it all down (don't send anywhere bad idea) then I forge ahead with my head held high and take one day at a time because rushing through the pain will just bring you faster than a sinking ship.

Thank you for reading my personal confessions, I hope they are helpful and if you have questions don't forget to email them to me --> myrabev@ajulydreamer.com, now how do you deal with disappointment? 

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::The Myrabev Life::: Week 25: Personal Confessions - How to deal with Disappointment

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Week 25: Personal Confessions - How to deal with Disappointment


Hi there! So after last week's post I got really good feedback and people have been asking me questions and one of them is "How do you deal with disappointment". If you read my post a couple weeks back about "the blogger behind the blog" you will remember that I mentioned I am a very emotional person because for me anything and everything goes straight to my heart and it hurts. I know most people have a filter so that things only reach and stay in their heads but for me my heart receives it before my brain does and it causes all sorts of issues for me BUT that is also my strength. I know you confused now because How can someone who gets hurt easily also have that as a strength?

Since I was a kid if anyone said or did anything to me I cried not necessary whaling but tears will follow. As I started to grow I used to try and blink the tears back so that I do not cry there and then but I don't know about you I love a good cry because then I get over it (disappointment or pain) quickly that way and it leaves my system faster than most people. So much that anytime I think of the hurt have experienced I don't get mad because I cried the MAD out of me, these days especially I just laugh then I look at the situation and best way to go about it. I also have another way of dealing with hurt and disappointment, I write things down. I will tell you a story of one of my first biggest disappointment in life.

I remember when I was 13 and started dating my FIRST crush, I thought @13 that he was THE ONE. I felt so much "love or lust" that I thought without him I would be lost bearing in mind I was way happy before he came along. Then one day the devil tested that supposed love I had for this boy, the crush asked me @13 him 18 to have sex with him. In today's talk that's rape pure and simple because apparently mental capacity of 13 year old is not high enough to understand full consequences of ones actions. Anyway, I was so hurt that he asked me that because my belief system told me NO SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE (back then). I told him NO and said (will never forget this) go find yourself a girl who wants to have sex with you because I ain't her. And by the grace of the heavens he did do just that, I found out about it obviously like a fool last. Because his sister and I were in same class and people were so interested in my relationship they all knew before me (high school for you). The girl he slept with was older than me and scared of me too, every time she saw me she used to leg it (funny that). So anyway, after the incident I decided that was it but before all could be concluded his friend who had a crush on me asked to see me I went innocently to talk to him. He made me laugh and smile which I hadn't done at that time for a while, whilst chatting my crush arrived and ignored the jesus outta me obviously I was hurt because he wronged me but because I had cried it out and wrote it all I didn't care that much. Later when I was leaving he had the audacity to accuse me of cheating and saying it was my fault for him sleeping with another girl "granted I told him to find someone else to sleep with" but not when we were dating. You should be happy to know my sweet 13 dumped his ass and found better frogs along the way, 4 years later the crush came back begging for my forgiveness. What the crush didn't know was the day I said goodbye to our relationship was the day I forgave him. I didn't have and still don't have time to hate people or not forgive them, I only have room for happiness and smiles all day long nothing else.

So this is how I deal with disappointments, I cry, I write it all down (don't send anywhere bad idea) then I forge ahead with my head held high and take one day at a time because rushing through the pain will just bring you faster than a sinking ship.

Thank you for reading my personal confessions, I hope they are helpful and if you have questions don't forget to email them to me --> myrabev@ajulydreamer.com, now how do you deal with disappointment? 

Labels: ,

27 Comments:

At 20 May 2014 at 07:42 , Anonymous Nayna Kanabar said...

Reading this made me realise how we all pent up emotions.its such a good idea to let them go and not dwell on them.

 
At 20 May 2014 at 07:48 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thank you Nayna, I am glad you agree x

 
At 20 May 2014 at 08:08 , Anonymous naomi said...

Good for you for letting the boy go, I agree with you about not dwelling on the past and letting things go

 
At 20 May 2014 at 08:10 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thanks Naomi x

 
At 20 May 2014 at 17:44 , Anonymous Lara Jean Becar said...

Way to go, sticking up for yourself! You're strong. I love your advice.

 
At 20 May 2014 at 17:49 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thank you Lara x

 
At 20 May 2014 at 17:49 , Anonymous Ashley Z. said...

Good information!

 
At 20 May 2014 at 18:00 , Anonymous Amberly said...

I think that's the perfect way to deal with disappointment!

 
At 20 May 2014 at 18:25 , Anonymous Leah from www.thatmamajama.com said...

Disappointment is so hard. I like that you write it down. This is more inspiration for me to keep a journal. Good luck with everything.

 
At 20 May 2014 at 19:39 , Anonymous Ruffled Paper - Jessica said...

That is a great way to deal with disappointment. I used to be very bad at handling the feelings and emotions of it all, but I've learned that somethings that are a disappointment at the time end up being a blessing later down the road.

 
At 20 May 2014 at 19:51 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

I agree Jessica, at times we don't know that disappointments are actually blessings in disguise x

 
At 20 May 2014 at 19:52 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thank you Leah, and your right disappointment is hard but as I said to Jessica they can be blessings in disguise x

 
At 20 May 2014 at 21:45 , Anonymous Rebekah said...

Good for you for having the maturity at 13 to say no!

 
At 20 May 2014 at 23:20 , Anonymous Logan Cantrell said...

I've dealt with this in the past. I found that if you write down a couple of positive things about your day every day, you will slowly start focusing more on the good rather than all the disappointments. It helps put things into perspective.

 
At 21 May 2014 at 08:04 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

It really does, thank you Logan x

 
At 21 May 2014 at 08:04 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thank you Rebekah

 
At 21 May 2014 at 17:20 , Anonymous Lyssadawson said...

It's so important to think positively even when things arent going your way!

 
At 21 May 2014 at 20:19 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Absolutely Alyssa x

 
At 25 May 2014 at 10:01 , Anonymous Rea Alducente said...

Most of us would always have teenage heartbreaks but glad to know you said no and still had the kindness to forgive.

 
At 25 May 2014 at 17:42 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

I am glad to know I was not the only one, I understand your feeling Leanne thanks for sharing x

 
At 25 May 2014 at 17:42 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thanks Rea, I think forgiveness allows us to more forward and be the better person or is it bigger person x

 
At 25 May 2014 at 23:07 , Anonymous April @ 100lbcountdown said...

Even though you say everything hits your heart, you have a clear understanding of what you should do and how to get rid of the pain. It was very mature of you to understand at 13, and to write it down, then keep going, is simple and easy for people to follow. I would have to say that the older I get the less I'm disappointed. I set extremely low expectations: prepare for the worst, pray for the best. sadly, in my youth I had so much disappointment from a father not wanting to be a part of my life and a mother not protecting me that, other people just didn't mean enough for them to be able to disappoint me. Thanks for co-hosting with Countdown in Style. Beautiful post!

 
At 25 May 2014 at 23:58 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thank you for having me co-hosting, reading my post and share your own personal confession. I think because I always give everyone the benefit of the doubt I have found am disappointed more than I want to know but I forge ahead regardless because I choose happiness above all else with my God that strengthens me x

 
At 26 May 2014 at 02:12 , Anonymous Laura Elizabeth said...

Bravo for you for saying no! It's so hard as a teen to not give it all up to that first one - but SO worth it in the long run!

 
At 26 May 2014 at 08:15 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thank Laura, I didn't realise how important my decision was at the time but I am super glad I went it my gut and said no x

 
At 27 May 2014 at 23:36 , Anonymous Brittnei Washington said...

That's so great that you even at that young age was able to learn about forgiveness. I, too, am very sensitive so I completely understand what you are saying. :) Thanks so much for being an awesome co-host with us at Countdown in Style!

 
At 28 May 2014 at 05:18 , Anonymous Mia Myrabev said...

Thank you for having me, I think forgiveness is the only way we can truly move forward x

 

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